Hmmm, so your idea of being intimate with your partner is purely based on sex, In my humble experience I have found that to be truly intimate with a woman it begins WAY before that.
You need to engage her brain well before her clitoris,
Women love communication (In a single day a woman will use at least 3 times the amount of words than a man)
Women love to feel valued and respected.
Being intimate can be as simple as listening to her, asking how her day is, how her pet cat or dog etc is, her knowing you are actually wanting to know this stuff is way more intimate for a woman than for a man,
I could go on but I am sure you get my point about being intimate not being just SEX, it is about the connection between the 2 people.