D
Deleted member 59
Guest
I woke up with these words in my head this morning, and even during my busy working routine, I could not let go of this thought... It's funny isn't it, of how you just feel certain things are somehow important, so important you must find a way of sharing it with the world...?
From time to time I get those itchy fingers and an inexplicable eagerness of turning into words the chaos I wear inside. It's the writer in me, a side of me rarely shown, but that jumps out when my heart and soul need to be poured into words.
It was exactly at 3 am when I woke up, my alarm clock was set to 6 am, but my ever working brain and mind were restless and I laid there thinking, watching and feeling my thoughts connecting and rapidly jumping into the next.
I started thinking about people and about the world, and about all the people in the planet and how they interact. I thought of friends I lost and the new friends I made. I thought about the usual silly quarrels and of the making up embrace. I thought about my family and of that uncle I no longer speak to... I thought of you and him and her, I thought about us all. I thought about the weak and the strong. I thought about the selfish and the selfgiving ones... I thought about the fighters and the quitters and of all the things done right, and of all the things done wrong.
I then thought about the people who handled way too much; so much more than what they care or wish to admit. I thought about their needs and of how they recklessly choose to ignore and null themselves in order to carry the burdens and pains of others... They look and act tough, I am sure they do, they wear armors and combat boots. They got the heavy shield and they look so fierce! But I imagine how much it hurts to always be so strong, you get no breaks, you get no choice, you can only move forward and if you trip and fall, and if you ever dare to fail and say you can't find the strength to fight no more, you become a disappointment for the ones you once stood up for...
The stronger you look, the more people will count on you to listen and aid them whenever needed. They come and dump their problems on you, and you help, but there's only much one can take. Limits are reached but to them no limit is ever given. They're seen and meant to take and take, and that's how it works. I know that not all of the human interactions are going to be as disastrous as this one. But that's how it goes... I need for when I am weak, because you are always strong. And because I always see you strong I create in my head the idea that you can handle my and your share of burden...
Those words were stuck in my head for over 20 hours at least... and I am still thinking about how and why we do the things we do, and act the way we act... maybe this will mean another night of no sleep? And I am sorry if the typing is a tad confusing, I did my best to make it clear...
Hope you enjoy the read,
Yours truly,
G x
From time to time I get those itchy fingers and an inexplicable eagerness of turning into words the chaos I wear inside. It's the writer in me, a side of me rarely shown, but that jumps out when my heart and soul need to be poured into words.
It was exactly at 3 am when I woke up, my alarm clock was set to 6 am, but my ever working brain and mind were restless and I laid there thinking, watching and feeling my thoughts connecting and rapidly jumping into the next.
I started thinking about people and about the world, and about all the people in the planet and how they interact. I thought of friends I lost and the new friends I made. I thought about the usual silly quarrels and of the making up embrace. I thought about my family and of that uncle I no longer speak to... I thought of you and him and her, I thought about us all. I thought about the weak and the strong. I thought about the selfish and the selfgiving ones... I thought about the fighters and the quitters and of all the things done right, and of all the things done wrong.
I then thought about the people who handled way too much; so much more than what they care or wish to admit. I thought about their needs and of how they recklessly choose to ignore and null themselves in order to carry the burdens and pains of others... They look and act tough, I am sure they do, they wear armors and combat boots. They got the heavy shield and they look so fierce! But I imagine how much it hurts to always be so strong, you get no breaks, you get no choice, you can only move forward and if you trip and fall, and if you ever dare to fail and say you can't find the strength to fight no more, you become a disappointment for the ones you once stood up for...
The stronger you look, the more people will count on you to listen and aid them whenever needed. They come and dump their problems on you, and you help, but there's only much one can take. Limits are reached but to them no limit is ever given. They're seen and meant to take and take, and that's how it works. I know that not all of the human interactions are going to be as disastrous as this one. But that's how it goes... I need for when I am weak, because you are always strong. And because I always see you strong I create in my head the idea that you can handle my and your share of burden...
Those words were stuck in my head for over 20 hours at least... and I am still thinking about how and why we do the things we do, and act the way we act... maybe this will mean another night of no sleep? And I am sorry if the typing is a tad confusing, I did my best to make it clear...
Hope you enjoy the read,
Yours truly,
G x