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I've been chatting here for a while now, and something that still surprises me is how people who come to a sex chat can still act and behave so awkwardly when it comes to talking about what turns them on and give them pleasure. I must say I used to be like that, but time and experience have opened my eyes and made me not get embarrassed over my own body, sexual desires, sexual preferences and so on.
A word that always pops up on chat room is the "Taboo" word. Taboo is by definition something that is not seen as a societal norm. And this word is mainly connected to guilt when it comes to sexual pleasure. So if not everyone is doing it, it's not normal and no one should do it? I say Nay!
What works for me to reach high levels of pleasure, orgasming, screaming (yeah I am using all those words) might not work for you, but it doesn't mean I should feel guilty about it, or that you should feel awkward about it. We all have our ways of finding pleasure and enjoying it, but it doesn't have to be the same for everyone.
So while reading some articles on the internet I found one that talks about some "taboos" that we all should be over by now:
1. Anal
Why is this even considered taboo anymore? For some reason we’re still complaining about it. Sure, you may not want something in your butt, but if other women (or men) do, then just let them. The problems college students have with anal sex arise because we really don’t understand it. We either think it hurts, it’s dirty, it’s slutty or that it’s all our partners want and we shouldn’t give it to them. Sure, it’s definitely not everybody’s cup of tea, and if you don’t do it carefully you’ll definitely have a very bad first experience with anal. However, for both men and women, it can produce a lot of pleasure.
Jordan, a senior at San Francisco State University, pretty much says it all. “Guess what everyone! I love anal sex! Get over it!” she says. “Me and my friend group are very vocal about our sex lives, and even then I know sometimes I’m being looked at funny if I talk about my positive experiences with anal.”
Dr. Marilyn Owen, a marriage and family therapist, weighs in on why the anal sex taboo exists, and needs to end. “In 2010, I remember The Journal of Sexual Medicine released a study that found that more than 40 percent of women in their early twenties had tried anal sex,” she says. “If that many young women are doing it, why are we still acting squeamish about it? Men and women both confess that it’s deeply pleasurable if you have a good experience, and it also grows intimacy. Butt play is pretty common practice, but by not talking about it we’re making it taboo and shameful.”
If anal is something you want to try and you explore it in a safe and healthy way, do it! And don’t be afraid to talk about it either. Sharing your best butt tips with your friends during your late-night Sex and the City-esque gossip is going to be spreading a positive anal environment.
2. Period sex
If you’re ashamed of your period or think you’re gross because of it, you need to conquer that way of thinking. Our patriarchal system taught you that, but we here at Her Campus are here to tell you that your period is normal and nothing to be sheepish about. If your partner thinks your period is gross too, you need to sit them down for a real talk conversation. Your uterus is going to shed once a month for most of your life, so it’s time accept that. More importantly we need to learn that period sex is okay. Not everyone goes faint at the sight of blood, and if you’re feeling horny, then being on your period doesn’t have to be a sexual barrier.
Avery, a senior at Purdue University, shares her take on the taboo of period sex. “I’ve had sex a few times on my period and I honestly think it feels better,” she says. “I usually want sex way more when I’m on my period. Also, if you’re not into period sex, then no pressure, but don’t turn your nose up at people who do it.”
If you’re in the mood to spice up that time of the month with some pleasure, enjoy yourself! Tbh, we have a lot more to worry about in college than freaking out about period sex.
3. Body hair
We’ve shaved body hair out of our lives because apparently “sexy” in our society means looking like a hairless cat. However, as body positive college women, can we please end this? Whether the hair is in your pubic area or in your armpits, by the time you get to college, body hair is something you need to get comfortable with, especially in terms of sex.
When you’re trying to study for finals, work, feed yourself and fit in an hour each day to watch Gossip Girl, shaving gets rightly pushed to the back of the priority list. While we totally back up our girls who feel sexier clean-shaven, know that feeling pressure to be constantly as smooth as a Barbie doll should be considered more taboo than having stubble like a normal person. Shaving is a behavior ingrained in us, but it doesn’t have to be the rule for everyone.
Michael, a sophomore at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo, weighs in on how guys really feel about hair. “Believe me, guys talk about it, and from what I know and my experience, most of us don’t care. If hair comes off in your mouth it can be kind of weird, but hair doesn’t make a difference for actually having sex. It’s confusing why there’s so much scandal around being hairy.”
I selected only the ones I found to be more interesting, but if you'd like to read the full list on the article here's the source:
https://www.hercampus.com/love/sex/5-sex-taboos-you-should-be-over-now
Now tell me what you think about it and whaf other taboos we should be over by now?
A word that always pops up on chat room is the "Taboo" word. Taboo is by definition something that is not seen as a societal norm. And this word is mainly connected to guilt when it comes to sexual pleasure. So if not everyone is doing it, it's not normal and no one should do it? I say Nay!
What works for me to reach high levels of pleasure, orgasming, screaming (yeah I am using all those words) might not work for you, but it doesn't mean I should feel guilty about it, or that you should feel awkward about it. We all have our ways of finding pleasure and enjoying it, but it doesn't have to be the same for everyone.
So while reading some articles on the internet I found one that talks about some "taboos" that we all should be over by now:
1. Anal
Why is this even considered taboo anymore? For some reason we’re still complaining about it. Sure, you may not want something in your butt, but if other women (or men) do, then just let them. The problems college students have with anal sex arise because we really don’t understand it. We either think it hurts, it’s dirty, it’s slutty or that it’s all our partners want and we shouldn’t give it to them. Sure, it’s definitely not everybody’s cup of tea, and if you don’t do it carefully you’ll definitely have a very bad first experience with anal. However, for both men and women, it can produce a lot of pleasure.
Jordan, a senior at San Francisco State University, pretty much says it all. “Guess what everyone! I love anal sex! Get over it!” she says. “Me and my friend group are very vocal about our sex lives, and even then I know sometimes I’m being looked at funny if I talk about my positive experiences with anal.”
Dr. Marilyn Owen, a marriage and family therapist, weighs in on why the anal sex taboo exists, and needs to end. “In 2010, I remember The Journal of Sexual Medicine released a study that found that more than 40 percent of women in their early twenties had tried anal sex,” she says. “If that many young women are doing it, why are we still acting squeamish about it? Men and women both confess that it’s deeply pleasurable if you have a good experience, and it also grows intimacy. Butt play is pretty common practice, but by not talking about it we’re making it taboo and shameful.”
If anal is something you want to try and you explore it in a safe and healthy way, do it! And don’t be afraid to talk about it either. Sharing your best butt tips with your friends during your late-night Sex and the City-esque gossip is going to be spreading a positive anal environment.
2. Period sex
If you’re ashamed of your period or think you’re gross because of it, you need to conquer that way of thinking. Our patriarchal system taught you that, but we here at Her Campus are here to tell you that your period is normal and nothing to be sheepish about. If your partner thinks your period is gross too, you need to sit them down for a real talk conversation. Your uterus is going to shed once a month for most of your life, so it’s time accept that. More importantly we need to learn that period sex is okay. Not everyone goes faint at the sight of blood, and if you’re feeling horny, then being on your period doesn’t have to be a sexual barrier.
Avery, a senior at Purdue University, shares her take on the taboo of period sex. “I’ve had sex a few times on my period and I honestly think it feels better,” she says. “I usually want sex way more when I’m on my period. Also, if you’re not into period sex, then no pressure, but don’t turn your nose up at people who do it.”
If you’re in the mood to spice up that time of the month with some pleasure, enjoy yourself! Tbh, we have a lot more to worry about in college than freaking out about period sex.
3. Body hair
We’ve shaved body hair out of our lives because apparently “sexy” in our society means looking like a hairless cat. However, as body positive college women, can we please end this? Whether the hair is in your pubic area or in your armpits, by the time you get to college, body hair is something you need to get comfortable with, especially in terms of sex.
When you’re trying to study for finals, work, feed yourself and fit in an hour each day to watch Gossip Girl, shaving gets rightly pushed to the back of the priority list. While we totally back up our girls who feel sexier clean-shaven, know that feeling pressure to be constantly as smooth as a Barbie doll should be considered more taboo than having stubble like a normal person. Shaving is a behavior ingrained in us, but it doesn’t have to be the rule for everyone.
Michael, a sophomore at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo, weighs in on how guys really feel about hair. “Believe me, guys talk about it, and from what I know and my experience, most of us don’t care. If hair comes off in your mouth it can be kind of weird, but hair doesn’t make a difference for actually having sex. It’s confusing why there’s so much scandal around being hairy.”
I selected only the ones I found to be more interesting, but if you'd like to read the full list on the article here's the source:
https://www.hercampus.com/love/sex/5-sex-taboos-you-should-be-over-now
Now tell me what you think about it and whaf other taboos we should be over by now?
