So here we go again...
My girlfriend held my nuts in her hand firmly and then crushed them into pieces, When I say nuts I mean peanuts of course, she had stolen them from me so I took my revenge and grabbed her melon's then fed them to the dog, then I made her watch as the dog ate her delicious melon's and laughed, "if you touch my food then bad things will happen to you" I said.
Little did I know that the next day my girlfriend had plotted an evil scheme, I opened the fridge to find that my cake wasn't there. I wondered where it had gone and then I saw it...the dog had cream and jam all over his nose, my girlfriend then entered the room and I questioned her, "how did the dog get hold of my cake?" I asked, she replied "oh he must have opened the fridge and taken it...".
I thought to myself, "oh yeah sure...the dog opened the fridge with his hands...", I knew my girlfriend had stolen my cake and gave it to the dog so I plotted my revenge. Later that day I stole her peanut butter then took the lid off and gave it to the dog, I quickly ran into the living room and sat there innocently, after a few minutes I saw my girlfriend heading into the kitchen.
Then it happened...
"Hey what the hell!?, my peanut butter!" She said, "I got up and then entered the kitchen and said "what is it?, what's wrong?". "How did the dog get my peanut butter?" She asked, I replied "how should I know, maybe he climbed up onto the counter, opened the cupboard then proceeded to take the jar and then open it..", the dog must be highly skilled if he can do all that...".
Later that day...
My girlfriend had cooked dinner and then I went to the bathroom, when I returned I found the dog sitting in my chair and an empty plate in front of him. "Umm where did my dinner go...." I said as the dog licked his lips, "oh yeah sorry, the dog got onto the chair then grabbed the knife and fork then ate your dinner" she said, moments later I found that she had hidden my dinner in the oven.
My girlfriend had switched my dinner plate with an empty plate then put the dog in the chair so it looked like he had eaten it. As we sat down and ate our dinner I began to plan my revenge on her then suddenly I had an idea, I asked her if she wanted pie for dessert and she replied "oh I would love some pie, I think there's a cream pie in the fridge, of course I knew there was a pie in the fridge I had seen it earlier.
I proceeded to the fridge then took out the cream pie, the dog licked his lips as he stared at the pie, moments later I reached my arm around in front of my girlfriend and then pushed it into her face. "That will teach you to trick me" I said, then suddenly the dog ran towards her and started licking the pieces of pie off her face, "get him off me!!" She said as I laughed hard and loud, my revenge was complete.
The next day...
I sprayed myself with deodorant and thought to myself, "this smells like....sausages and bacon...", then suddenly I heard footsteps moving fast towards me. It was the dog!!, he could smell the sausage and bacon smell and then leapt onto me tackling me to the ground, the dog and I began to wrestle each other, at that moment I realised that my girlfriend had replaced my deodorant with oil and grease she must have used when cooking breakfast.
Moments later she walked in on me and the dog wrestling and then laughed, after several minutes wrestling the dog I managed to escape and then ran into the bathroom and shut myself in. I could hear my girlfriend laughing outside the bathroom and praising the dog "good dog, I'll get you some sausages as reward" she said, shortly after I showered three times before I had finally got rid of the smell of sausages and bacon.
The dog was well fed and I could have had my revenge but I decided to let her win....this time...
My girlfriend held my nuts in her hand firmly and then crushed them into pieces, When I say nuts I mean peanuts of course, she had stolen them from me so I took my revenge and grabbed her melon's then fed them to the dog, then I made her watch as the dog ate her delicious melon's and laughed, "if you touch my food then bad things will happen to you" I said.
Little did I know that the next day my girlfriend had plotted an evil scheme, I opened the fridge to find that my cake wasn't there. I wondered where it had gone and then I saw it...the dog had cream and jam all over his nose, my girlfriend then entered the room and I questioned her, "how did the dog get hold of my cake?" I asked, she replied "oh he must have opened the fridge and taken it...".
I thought to myself, "oh yeah sure...the dog opened the fridge with his hands...", I knew my girlfriend had stolen my cake and gave it to the dog so I plotted my revenge. Later that day I stole her peanut butter then took the lid off and gave it to the dog, I quickly ran into the living room and sat there innocently, after a few minutes I saw my girlfriend heading into the kitchen.
Then it happened...
"Hey what the hell!?, my peanut butter!" She said, "I got up and then entered the kitchen and said "what is it?, what's wrong?". "How did the dog get my peanut butter?" She asked, I replied "how should I know, maybe he climbed up onto the counter, opened the cupboard then proceeded to take the jar and then open it..", the dog must be highly skilled if he can do all that...".
Later that day...
My girlfriend had cooked dinner and then I went to the bathroom, when I returned I found the dog sitting in my chair and an empty plate in front of him. "Umm where did my dinner go...." I said as the dog licked his lips, "oh yeah sorry, the dog got onto the chair then grabbed the knife and fork then ate your dinner" she said, moments later I found that she had hidden my dinner in the oven.
My girlfriend had switched my dinner plate with an empty plate then put the dog in the chair so it looked like he had eaten it. As we sat down and ate our dinner I began to plan my revenge on her then suddenly I had an idea, I asked her if she wanted pie for dessert and she replied "oh I would love some pie, I think there's a cream pie in the fridge, of course I knew there was a pie in the fridge I had seen it earlier.
I proceeded to the fridge then took out the cream pie, the dog licked his lips as he stared at the pie, moments later I reached my arm around in front of my girlfriend and then pushed it into her face. "That will teach you to trick me" I said, then suddenly the dog ran towards her and started licking the pieces of pie off her face, "get him off me!!" She said as I laughed hard and loud, my revenge was complete.
The next day...
I sprayed myself with deodorant and thought to myself, "this smells like....sausages and bacon...", then suddenly I heard footsteps moving fast towards me. It was the dog!!, he could smell the sausage and bacon smell and then leapt onto me tackling me to the ground, the dog and I began to wrestle each other, at that moment I realised that my girlfriend had replaced my deodorant with oil and grease she must have used when cooking breakfast.
Moments later she walked in on me and the dog wrestling and then laughed, after several minutes wrestling the dog I managed to escape and then ran into the bathroom and shut myself in. I could hear my girlfriend laughing outside the bathroom and praising the dog "good dog, I'll get you some sausages as reward" she said, shortly after I showered three times before I had finally got rid of the smell of sausages and bacon.
The dog was well fed and I could have had my revenge but I decided to let her win....this time...
