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Paws & Punchlines: Chronicles of a Doggone Duo 10 (Dog version)

Solara

Solara

Epic Legend
VIP
Senior's
Posting Freak
Previous Episode

ABANDONED

Me: I’m back!

She: *glares from the couch dramatically* …You abandoned me.

Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: Time is a social construct and I don't subscribe to your human measurements. For all I knew, you died.

Me: I went to receive a courier !

She: And what if you’d been eaten by squirrels? What then?

Me: The squirrels?

She: They’re organized. I’ve seen them plotting.

Me: Did you… chew the rug while I was gone?

She: I panicked. Grief does strange things to a dog.

Me: Three. Minutes.

She: I wrote a will. You weren’t in it.

Me: I was literally right at the gate!

She: You could’ve at least left a scarf. Something that smelled like you. A goodbye note. An apology poem.

Me: Dramatic much?

She: I’ve already started my memoir. Chapter one: Betrayal at the Door.

 
Last edited:
Solara said:
Previous Episode

ABANDONED

Me: I’m back!

She: *glares from the couch dramatically* …You abandoned me.

Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: Time is a social construct and I don't subscribe to your human measurements. For all I knew, you died.

Me: I went to receive a courier !

She: And what if you’d been eaten by squirrels? What then?

Me: The squirrels?

She: They’re organized. I’ve seen them plotting.

Me: Did you… chew the rug while I was gone?

She: I panicked. Grief does strange things to a dog.

Me: Three. Minutes.

She: I wrote a will. You weren’t in it.

Me: I was literally right at the gate!

She: You could’ve at least left a scarf. Something that smelled like you. A goodbye note. An apology poem.

Me: Dramatic much?

She: I’ve already started my memoir. Chapter one: Betrayal at the Door.
Click to expand...

Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: flings herself onto the floor like a Victorian widow You vanished. Vanished into the void. I wept. I howled. I composed a ballad.

Me: A ballad?

She: "Gone with the Courier: A Tragedy in Three Barks." It'll be a hit on Spotify.

Me: I was literally ten steps away.

She: clutching her chew toy like a talisman You left me defenseless. What if the mailman had returned? WHAT IF I HAD TO MAKE EYE CONTACT?

Me: You’ve faced the vacuum cleaner. You’ll survive.

She: The vacuum is honest about its evil. The squirrels are subtle. Psychological warfare.

Me: You chewed the rug like it insulted your ancestors.

She: Pain needed an outlet. The rug was... convenient.

Me: I’m gonna need therapy after this.

She: narrow eyes I’ll book you in. Right after my memoir launch. Chapter Two: "The Door That Never Opened Fast Enough."
 
Solara said:
Previous Episode

ABANDONED

Me: I’m back!

She: *glares from the couch dramatically* …You abandoned me.

Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: Time is a social construct and I don't subscribe to your human measurements. For all I knew, you died.

Me: I went to receive a courier !

She: And what if you’d been eaten by squirrels? What then?

Me: The squirrels?

She: They’re organized. I’ve seen them plotting.

Me: Did you… chew the rug while I was gone?

She: I panicked. Grief does strange things to a dog.

Me: Three. Minutes.

She: I wrote a will. You weren’t in it.

Me: I was literally right at the gate!

She: You could’ve at least left a scarf. Something that smelled like you. A goodbye note. An apology poem.

Me: Dramatic much?

She: I’ve already started my memoir. Chapter one: Betrayal at the Door.
Click to expand...
Maybe u r reflection on her :Cwl: drama
 
De.whisky said:
Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: flings herself onto the floor like a Victorian widow You vanished. Vanished into the void. I wept. I howled. I composed a ballad.

Me: A ballad?

She: "Gone with the Courier: A Tragedy in Three Barks." It'll be a hit on Spotify.

Me: I was literally ten steps away.

She: clutching her chew toy like a talisman You left me defenseless. What if the mailman had returned? WHAT IF I HAD TO MAKE EYE CONTACT?

Me: You’ve faced the vacuum cleaner. You’ll survive.

She: The vacuum is honest about its evil. The squirrels are subtle. Psychological warfare.

Me: You chewed the rug like it insulted your ancestors.

She: Pain needed an outlet. The rug was... convenient.

Me: I’m gonna need therapy after this.

She: narrow eyes I’ll book you in. Right after my memoir launch. Chapter Two: "The Door That Never Opened Fast Enough."
Click to expand...
Do u have a pet, mister?
 
zhou said:
Shatap solar system u throw the whole movie scene without "cut" statement from director which means unstoppable drama :Cwl:
Click to expand...
Err... Idk why u have that perception about me.....
:giggle: am just an innocent simple soul
 
Solara said:
Previous Episode

ABANDONED

Me: I’m back!

She: *glares from the couch dramatically* …You abandoned me.

Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: Time is a social construct and I don't subscribe to your human measurements. For all I knew, you died.

Me: I went to receive a courier !

She: And what if you’d been eaten by squirrels? What then?

Me: The squirrels?

She: They’re organized. I’ve seen them plotting.

Me: Did you… chew the rug while I was gone?

She: I panicked. Grief does strange things to a dog.

Me: Three. Minutes.

She: I wrote a will. You weren’t in it.

Me: I was literally right at the gate!

She: You could’ve at least left a scarf. Something that smelled like you. A goodbye note. An apology poem.

Me: Dramatic much?

She: I’ve already started my memoir. Chapter one: Betrayal at the Door.
Click to expand...
:clapping:...tit for tat. She is far better then any hooman . Credit goes to you for creating such personality .Keep it up. ty.:cool:
 
Solara said:
Previous Episode

ABANDONED

Me: I’m back!

She: *glares from the couch dramatically* …You abandoned me.

Me: I was gone for three minutes.

She: Time is a social construct and I don't subscribe to your human measurements. For all I knew, you died.

Me: I went to receive a courier !

She: And what if you’d been eaten by squirrels? What then?

Me: The squirrels?

She: They’re organized. I’ve seen them plotting.

Me: Did you… chew the rug while I was gone?

She: I panicked. Grief does strange things to a dog.

Me: Three. Minutes.

She: I wrote a will. You weren’t in it.

Me: I was literally right at the gate!

She: You could’ve at least left a scarf. Something that smelled like you. A goodbye note. An apology poem.

Me: Dramatic much?

She: I’ve already started my memoir. Chapter one: Betrayal at the Door.
Click to expand...
If it's dramatic i am not gonna read huh
 
Drama is life when it comes to pets... and my god are they dramatic...

I loved this episode @Solara very well written as always
 
Solara said:
Do u have a pet, mister?
Click to expand...
Pet? Yeah… I’ve got a little furry storm at home who thinks I’m her whole world.

But lately, I feel like there’s someone else sneaking into that space too
Someone with sass, drama, and a spark I didn’t know I needed.

If I’m being honest…
I wouldn’t mind adopting you too
Not as a pet, obviously, but maybe as someone I could come home to.
Someone who writes ballads and steals my hoodies.
Sound like a deal?
 
De.whisky said:
Pet? Yeah… I’ve got a little furry storm at home who thinks I’m her whole world.

But lately, I feel like there’s someone else sneaking into that space too
Someone with sass, drama, and a spark I didn’t know I needed.

If I’m being honest…
I wouldn’t mind adopting you too
Not as a pet, obviously, but maybe as someone I could come home to.
Someone who writes ballads and steals my hoodies.
Sound like a deal?
Click to expand...
Whoaaaa!!! U did not just do that !
 
Solara said:
Whoaaaa!!! U did not just do that !
Click to expand...
Oh, but I did…
And if that made your heart skip just wait till I lean in, real close, whisper that same offer with my lips brushing your skin.
Because when I say come home to,
I don’t just mean late-night takeout and hoodie theft… I mean slow burns, stolen breaths,
and hands that memorize you like poetry.
So tell me, darling
should I start clearing space in my bed… or just let you take over the whole damn place?
 
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