TheWanderer
Active Ranker
Last weekend, I was meeting my friends for drinks. During our usual chit-chat, one friend suddenly said, “Do you know what happened in my company?”
And suddenly, we started paying more attention to him than to the food.
He went on: “In my company, a graduate trainee called Deepak went on a two-month leave and came back as Deepika.”
For a few seconds, we were silent. Then came some bad PJ jokes and the usual bro comment: “Is she hot now?”
After a few lewd comments, he told us that HR had to sensitise all the departments—not to bully her, pass comments, or make her uncomfortable, and to create a safe working environment for her.
Apparently, the guys were uncomfortable because they didn’t know how to behave around her, while the girls were uncomfortable because the person they once knew as “he” was now using the same washroom as them and was privy to all their gossip.
The conversation then moved on to some other random stuff… but my mind was still stuck on her.
I admired the courage she showed in being true to herself and returning to the office where everyone knew her as “he.” How much bullying, whispering, taunting and discomfort she must have faced—and probably still faces—and yet she chose to be her authentic self.
I really wanted to salute her courage and willpower.
The discussion left me with only two questions:
1. Am I really as accepting and non-judgmental as I think I am? How would I actually behave?
2. Do I have even a fraction of that courage to be myself?
The answer to the second question was a clear NO.
Just this morning, someone asked me, “What are you wearing? It looks like a night suit.”
And I thought about that comment for the next hour while driving to work.
Am I looking bad? Isn’t it actually stylish?
It took me a good 60 minutes to finally let that comment go and tell myself:
“To hell with what people think.”
And maybe that’s what I took away from her story.
Sometimes, being yourself takes much more courage than we realise
And suddenly, we started paying more attention to him than to the food.
He went on: “In my company, a graduate trainee called Deepak went on a two-month leave and came back as Deepika.”
For a few seconds, we were silent. Then came some bad PJ jokes and the usual bro comment: “Is she hot now?”
After a few lewd comments, he told us that HR had to sensitise all the departments—not to bully her, pass comments, or make her uncomfortable, and to create a safe working environment for her.
Apparently, the guys were uncomfortable because they didn’t know how to behave around her, while the girls were uncomfortable because the person they once knew as “he” was now using the same washroom as them and was privy to all their gossip.
The conversation then moved on to some other random stuff… but my mind was still stuck on her.
I admired the courage she showed in being true to herself and returning to the office where everyone knew her as “he.” How much bullying, whispering, taunting and discomfort she must have faced—and probably still faces—and yet she chose to be her authentic self.
I really wanted to salute her courage and willpower.
The discussion left me with only two questions:
1. Am I really as accepting and non-judgmental as I think I am? How would I actually behave?
2. Do I have even a fraction of that courage to be myself?
The answer to the second question was a clear NO.
Just this morning, someone asked me, “What are you wearing? It looks like a night suit.”
And I thought about that comment for the next hour while driving to work.
Am I looking bad? Isn’t it actually stylish?
It took me a good 60 minutes to finally let that comment go and tell myself:
“To hell with what people think.”
And maybe that’s what I took away from her story.
Sometimes, being yourself takes much more courage than we realise
